Tuesday, April 17, 2012

A Trail of Flames - My Travel Log Through Skyrim

I've decided to post a brief (and very incomplete) travel log of my experiences with Skyrim.

Expect heavy spoilers, exposure to my pure train of thought, and use of capital letters.  You have been warned!

***

La de da.  Character creation.  I don't remember a whole lot here, except that I picked being a Breton.  They have magic resistance after all!  I can't even remember why I picked them.

***

Wow, I'm in a wagon, look at the people with me.  What, we're prisoners?  Wow, this place is pretty.  What are these guys even talking about?  Where is that place again?  I can't say I've heard of it before.  Wow, these houses are sure realistic looking.  Look, the people are watching us!  People look kind of creepy.  Wow, that execution was gruesome.

I DON'T WANT TO DIE! I haven't been able to kill any monsters yet. :'(

HOLY CRAP! A dragon!

Running around now.  I have a sword and shield!  When do I get to use magic?  Oh, a spellbook.  Wait a second, I had magic from the start?

(At this point I restarted my character from the beginning)

***

Burning this with flames is fun!  Although this seems kind of weak.  Yeah!  I leveled up!  What is this perk thing?  Oh...interesting.  Flames, frost, or shock.  Hmm... (analysis).  Flames seem to do the most damage for the least magic.  I'll go with them.

***

(After leaving intro area)

Hmm...can I kill this guy I was just traveling with.  Hmm..

(commence 5 minute long battle where I spent most of the time running away, throwing a few brief gouts of flame and quaffing every last potion in my inventory)

Yeah!  I win!  Wait a second, he's only kneeling down.  Do I get to finish him?  (I applied more flames).  Maybe I need to use a sword to get one of thsoe awesome finishing moves! (tries sword) Wait..why didn't that work?

(Guy stands up and starts attacking me) Whyyyyyyy?!?!

(At this point I restarted at a save before I went on the rampage) Low blow, game, low blow!

***

Hmm...Riverwood is such a quiet town.  I've finished all the quests to do here.  I wonder what happens if I were to go on a rampage.

(Commends 5 minutes of running around shooting flames out of my hands at people)

What, you can't kill children?! (Yes, I actually said that)

***

Whiterun is a pretty nice place.  Oh, I have a quest to go pick up this dagger somewhere near Riverwood.

(going to pick up dagger) Why is she shooting FIREBALLS at me?!  This is so unfair! (commence taking cover and trying to counter with my own weak spells)

Oh, now that I've returned the dagger, some guy wants to follow me?  I have to keep him alive?  Grrr.  (after about an hour or two of trying to do other quests with this guy and keep him alive, I get frustrated at how easily he dies)  Why do you through yourself into the fight when you can't fight?! (finally I decide to do his quest)

Ah, here's the cave I need to go in.  And NOW a dragon attacks?!  I'm not keeping this guy alive anymore. Into the cave we go!

(Thankfully, he didn't die after that)

***

Finally, the Impact feat!  Wow...this feat is pretty strong.  As long as I don't run out of magicka, I can keep casting spells and keep people from attacking me!  (Sadly, I run out of magicka before enemies run out of health)

***

I want to go to Winterhold.  I think I'll travel up the eastern coast with my new horse.  Sure is snowy.  Wow, lots of bears.  Ack, wolves! (horse dies).  Nooooo!! Oh well (loots horse)

Finally, after so long of traveling through the wastes, I can head to Winterhold!

***

The fireball spell sure is fun!

(fires, misses, enemy emerges intact from the fiery explosion) Eeeeek!  (more running in fear)

(in another dungeon)  Ha!  This fireball should finish him off, eeeek! (dead body lunges at me)  Oh, when I kill people with fireball, sometimes the spell impact can send them in odd directions (this leads to much entertainment and terror.  Having newly defeated monsters lunge at me is not my idea of fun, watching them fly across the room is!)

***

Ah, finally I get to the famous Solitude.  Hey look, an execution.  Lots of people here.  Hmm... (throwing fireballs around, making town guards angry).  Oh, I'd better heal, I'm about to- (dies)  Well...that just happened.

***

Oh, my enchanting skill is getting kind of high.  I guess I can enchant some things.  (browsing enchantments) Wow, I can stack these enchantments that make my fireballs cost less magicka to cast, and I can improve my carrying weight!  (makes some new items).  Wow, cheaper fireballs is soooo nice!

(several hours and more enchantments later) Wow, free fireballs are soooo nice!  This so breaks the game.

***

Being able to stun lock things near infinitely with my high level fire spell is getting kind of boring.  Hmm...

Hey Ulfric, you're some great hero, right?!  (casting fire magic of Ulfric, who "dies" in one hit).  Well, that was disappointing (this is said while dancing around his throne room, decimating his guards)  Well, that wasn't satisfying at all!  (running around throwing fireballs everywhere, including into the kitchen just to make all the objects in the room scatter)

***

Yeah!  I've maxed out my Destruction magic skill and now I can get the Master level spells!  (after some Google searches and some effort, I acquire the highest level magic skills)  OK, these should be...well, this is a bit disappointing.  (I found the fire and ice spells to be a bit disappointing, unless they were used to start fiery rampages).  Now, the lightning one...holy awesome!  Lightning chain gun!!!

(tries Master lightning spell in dungeon, dies) Well...those are useless.

Sadly, The Master level fire spell is not this epic.

***

Ah, Solitude, we have a rematch! (after five minutes, all the people that can die, are dead, and I'm mostly running around getting bored for lack of new things to burn)

***

OK, time to finish the final quest line.

Wow, that's pretty cool.

Whoa, epic.

Holy awesome!!!

Fire raining from the sky!  That was an awesome final boss fight! (even though I "broke" the game)

***

Well, Skyrim was a pretty awesome game.  I obviously have at least a hundred hours more of game play to put in it, although after I figured out how to cast fireballs for free, the game got incredibly easy.  Only archers were annoying at that point (especially because they were so hard to hit!).

3 comments:

  1. This proves to me that you are a closet sociopath. My soulless gingerness refuses to share this based off the principle of protecting other gingers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stephen, isn't flinging fire until everything burns the reason why your not allowed to volunteer at the orphanage anymore?

      Delete
    2. Joe! You can't just ask someone that on a public blog! That's sensitive information. It's not his fault that he's a daywalker with pyromaniacal tendencies.

      Delete

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