Mr. Fantastic Knows Nothing… Welcome to Parenting

Like many people, I’m sure, I was somewhat skeptical going into the new Fantastic Four movies. The two movies with Chris Evans were before I got enamored by superhero movies (besides Spider-Man) and the subsequent reboot from Fox was underwhelming. But I trust Feige and the Marvel Studios crew–Even when I don’t thoroughly enjoy a Marvel movie, I still think they’re “positively okay” with few exceptions (Eternals). All that on my mind, I definitely did not expect to get emotional over a superhero movie.

I don’t often cry during movies. Plenty of times I want to, but the tears won’t come (that’s a conversation for me and my therapist). Inside Out 2 and Moana 2 are two exceptions where my heart apparently resonated with the movie enough to ugly cry. But a superhero movie? I didn’t expect this.

From trailers, we knew going into the movie that it was going to be about the Fantastic Four being a family. We knew Sue (Invisible Woman) would be pregnant and the whole team would be invested in the new baby. They even gave us a glimpse beforehand that Galactus would have an interest in the child. What I didn’t expect was the raw emotion from the Fantastic Four’s struggle.

Over the course of the movie, Reed Richards (Mr. Fantastic) and his wife grappled with the idea that their child was apparently special (according to Galactus) and that they could spare Earth if they’d give their child to the big bad. However, as a father and a human being, I could easily see and feel the conflict arising between the two new parents and the population of Planet Earth. The choice to give up baby Nathaniel to save the human race was the logical course of action–one human life in exchange for billions of others. And that’s exactly what the human race wanted them to do! But his parents wouldn’t accept that.

I can’t imagine the turmoil of being asked to give up either of my daughters in exchange for anything, even the Earth. As a wise mother would, Sue summed it up perfectly though: “I will not sacrifice my child for the world, but I will not sacrifice this world for my child.” How wise a mother to find another way and insist that the people of Earth work together. All women (and men) should aspire to be like Sue Storm!

However, like many men, Mr. Fantastic went into fix-it mode and tried to solve the problem logically… which we already established would be tragic. This genius man (probably smarter than Tony Stark himself) finally found a problem he couldn’t fix. I’ve been a father for over five years now and there’s nothing more humbling and fulfilling in the world. Every day my girls drive me crazy and it’s a struggle to choose humility instead of frustration. But they also snuggle with me and I can tell that they feel safe in my arms. Even as a genius, Reed Richards needed some humble pie.

My dad has said many times that everyone is an expert in parenting, until they have kids. It was true for Mr. Fantastic. It’s true for me everyday.

LDS Geeks Podcast #19: Bandit Heeler is #DadGoals

Of all TV dads in recent years, one stands above all else, Bandit Heeler. Maybe it's because he's a cartoon dog–maybe it's because he's from a kids' show– but parents love it too. As for me, I think it's because dads find him so relatable. So for Father's Day this June, Kenton and I decided to discuss #DadGoals himself.

--Spencer

Listen to Episode 19 on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Subscribe on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube

Check out Spencer's recent blog posts: click here

Check out Kenton's recent blog posts: click here

Show Notes:

        Spencer's Recommendations: Phineas and Ferb

        Kenton's Recommendations: Merlin

Bandit is Why I Loved "The Sign"

So last month I asked Joe to review Bluey's extended episode "The Sign", and he did not disappoint. But as soon as I read his review, I knew I needed to write my own. This isn't a rebuttal to his post, at least not in the traditional sense, but I definitely wanted to share a different perspective on the episode and why, in contrast to Joe, I loved it.

I watched "The Sign" with my girls while we were visiting Utah for my brother-in-law's wedding, and in the midst of house hunting, so the wedding and move were topics I could already relate to. My heart felt for Bandit: wrestling through a seemingly impossible situation, trying to do the right thing for his family. 

Understandably for Joe and anyone else who had issues with the Heeler family cancelling their move in "The Sign", there was a lesson that was seemingly negated by staying. We learned from Calypso that things don't always work out the way we want them, and the ambiguous ending in the story of "the Farmer" left that point front and center for Bluey throughout the rest of the episode. To anyone who took issue with that abrupt turn of events, the change in tone and direction, I feel for you, and it isn't the only abrupt twist of events. Just look at Brandy! For the record, I agree that Brandy’s sudden pregnancy feels cheap after watching “Onesies”—mostly because she was just an Easter egg; if she’s gonna be pregnant finally, she deserves her own episode again. But I digress...

As a father, my focus in the episode was on Bandit. Compared to the kids and Chili he had limited screen time, but his time was impactful. It was obvious to me that, like any decent father, he wanted the best for his kids. I think he truly believed that the move and the better paying job would give his kids what they needed. But that's part of the problem here. 

As far as we can tell from three seasons of Bluey, there's nothing to indicate that the Heelers are in any dire financial hardship. Like many families, they probably have a mortgage and some debt, but nothing that precluded them from their basic needs and a little extra. So why was Bandit concerned about giving them a better life? Probably for the same reason I felt guilty using my time off to recover from a splitting headache. 

There’s something about being a father that’s simultaneously humbling and empowering. I think any good father has this near constant wonder if he’s raising his kids properly. Am I giving them enough attention? Am I listening properly? Am I doing enough? Am I good enough? I think this is what Bandit was dealing with (some have speculated he’s had this on his mind as far back as “Stickbird”). There’s a constant searching for all good fathers to give their kids enough and to make them happy. And I think sometimes we get the wrong idea about what will make that happen. 

Bandit thought a better paying job would give him the means to give his kids the best life. Maybe sometimes a move and a better paying job is best. Maybe sometimes planting roots is best. But what’s most important is to try where you're already planted. I know Yoda said “do or do not” but I believe trying to see the best and do our best as fathers will matter more than a high-paying salary. Cling to your Chili and do the best you can. Maybe ripping the sign out was the wrong move for Bandit; but if that’s the case, then he and Chili made the mistake together.

A line from Girl Meets World come to mind. It's when Maya confronts her birth father: “Your job was to stay.” That is a truly powerful lesson. The greatest thing as fathers that we can do, dads, is to be present with your Blueys and Bingos. Do as best you can. And if you’re ever feeling insecure, like you can’t measure up to a cartoon dog (we’ll talk about that on the podcast a little next month), or you feel you can't be the dad you think you ought to, please look at your kids and remember how much they love you (my therapist throws that trump card at me all the time)–and in the words of Wreck-It Ralph, “If that little kid likes me, how bad can I be?”

So you want to bring your kids to Comic Con...

(Guest Post by Ken)

Among geeks there are few rites of passage as big as attending a Comic Con (or “Fan Expo,” or other similar name that means the same thing). And yet, until last weekend I had never actually been to one myself. I’ve always been on the fence about going, but have finally given it a try… well, sort of. You see, I brought my kids with me. 

I attended Friday and Saturday of the Dallas Fax Expo last weekend. There were big names there like William Shatner, George Takei, Zachary Levi, Stephen Amell, Adam Savage, and more. (Sadly, a reunion visit from Frodo, Sam, Pippin, and Merry in a commemorative 20th anniversary Lord of the Rings panel was canceled last minute). I saw some of these people in person and was impressed to see their friendliness with fans. But I didn’t attend any panels or meet-and-greets because on Friday I had my 6-year-old son and on Saturday I had my 4-year-old daughter in tow and kids aren’t really keen to stand in long lines to see some old people who to them bear no significance. 

Taking each of my two older children on a “daddy date” with me was a nice way of being able to get out and do something social with the friend who invited me while also getting some great time in with my kids, but it will definitely alter your conference experience. Of course, as a first-time attendee, I can’t quite comment on what I was supposedly “missing out on,” but I can give you the pros and cons of taking your kids to a Con, at least through the lens of my experience at the Dallas Fax Expo.

Kid Specific Programming

There was a room, somewhat distanced from the main events and large crowds, specifically designated as the “Family Zone.” They had a number of craft activities and play areas for kids, though some of the play areas were lacking (one was literally just all the cardboard boxes used for supplies shipped in to set up the expo so the kids could stack them in towers; clever, but it seemed very last minute and didn’t hold my kids’ interest). 

Arts and crafts time at Dallas Fan Expo!

This area also hosted a number of events geared towards children. One event my children were both interested in, and which was thankfully held both days, was the Harry Potter Sorting Ceremony, as we’ve been reading the Harry Potter books together this year (we’re three quarters through Prisoner of Azkaban right now). This was a genuinely nice event and my son really enjoyed getting sorted (into Gryffindor, no less!). My daughter loved the idea, but when her turn came, she became like the kid who waits in the line to see Santa only to panic and scream at the finish line. She was so scared she might get sorted into Slytherin that she would not get in the chair. The team in charge kindly let her get a Gryffindor pin afterwards that she’s been wearing ever since. 

My son got sorted into Gryffindor!

The sorting ceremony was genuinely entertaining, featuring the commentary of the presenting “wizards” and an actual talking hat who responded in real time to specific conversations with each recipient. Only one thing irritated me about this event (and it was a bigger problem on Saturday than Friday): the number of adults who quickly dominated the front of the line of an event specifically marked for children and made the intended audience of sometimes attention-deficit children wait in a very long line. I don’t mind adults wanting to play Harry Potter games at a con, but at an event for children they should at least let all the kids go first and if there is extra time they can then do adults. The line ended up having a cutoff on Saturday and some kids got turned away while more than half of those who actually got to be sorted were adults without kids. And while my own daughter ultimately panicked at the finish line, she was so excited just to be there that if she’d been told “No” while a bunch of grown ups got sorted instead, she’d have been truly devastated. Incidentally, my daughter had a less panicky experience later with the Jedi Padowan training event where she got to learn lightsaber skills, and this event did a much better job of being truly kids-only. 

Overall, the family-centric offerings at Dallas Fan Expo managed to just clear the “acceptable” bar. The Harry Potter and Star Wars events were genuinely fun, but other “events” turned out to be a lot of nothing, and lots of times there wasn’t much specifically offered to kids and families other than the meager craft table. But my kids did enjoy the activities that were aimed at them and that made it easier for them to spend some time looking at other areas of the con in-between that were aimed more at adults. I wasn’t wowed by the family offerings, and hope that maybe in a further post-COVID world they may up their game a bit in that regard.

My daughter learning to be a Jedi!

The Booths (AKA, The Minefield)

Much of the real estate space of the conference center rented for the event was devoted to various booths, primarily for vendors selling art, comic books (the historical origin of these events), collectibles, anything even vaguely geek-connected, and even a few random things that aren’t geek-specific at all (one guy tried to sell me solar panels and another was pedaling water filtration systems). This is the zone that wants your money. I admit that it is a fascinating place to walk around. I’m not a huge collector myself, so it wasn’t particularly tempting, but it was still fun to see especially the homemade and handcrafted wares, or the vast collections some people acquired over decades. 

Of course, when you bring kids who realize that this is a shopping experience and not a museum, you start to see the widening of their eyes in this cornucopia of toys and colorful oddities. The subtle questioning of whether we could buy something started early with my son. Ultimately, each child was allowed to buy an old throwback comic book from the $2 boxes. My son found a 1964 gem where Lex Luthor appears to turn Superman into a purple dragon, while my daughter picked the 1980 Avengers titled that first introduced Yellowjacket as a villain. Allowing them to get SOMETHING helped placate and tame the requests for all the other fun things, such as toys that are insanely expensive because they are some throwback collectible pre-dating the Carter administration but just look like a regular toy to a 6-year-old. 

Comic books selected by my children

The “I-Want-That!” trap was tempered by the other big downside of this area: its sheer claustrophobia. Perhaps I’m still adjusting to crowds after 18 months of pandemic, but this part of the con had narrow walkways and lots of people and I felt genuinely uncomfortable spending too much time there. Thankfully, my daughter especially felt the same way and so her desire to see and ask for cool things was countered by her distaste for the teeming crowds. 

Other Stuff

A quick note on food: The food court offerings were modest. I expected more vendors given the crowd size, but the lines moved pleasantly fast. The prices were about what I expected: a little more than you’d pay normally, but not the highest. In my head I have a continuum of food pricing from low to high that goes:

Regular fast food/food truck < Mall Food Court < Airport < Theme Park

The same item will cost more as you move to the right along the continuum. The food offering here were priced squarely in the “Mall Food Court” zone. And I gotta add that the personal pizzas we got were… surprisingly good! My kids approved as well, though they were disappointed that Hawaiian was not an option.

Eating surprisingly not bad pizza

Cosplay was fun for the kids to observe. While a few of the costumes were scary or edgy, for the most part the kids delighted just in seeing all the fun characters. My daughter adored that my friend Spencer was dressed as Nick Wilde from Zootopia, and she saw a Flynn Ryder from Tangled who she instantly recognized and pretty much melted over. My son, upon hearing that people would wear costumes, actually got into the fun himself as a few minutes before we left home he grabbed his strap on butterfly wings that he has thoroughly worn out over the last few years. Some may find it a bit odd to see a boy wearing monarch wings, but he loves all things science and had a bug-obsession phase a couple years ago. I love that nobody looked at him strange for wearing his beloved wings, and in fact he got lots of compliments. 

The wandering droids were a hit with the kids

Of course, as mentioned earlier, there are many experiences you’ll have to forego if you bring kids. I didn’t even attempt to go to any panels, screenings, Q&A’s, or meet and greets, because I know my kids would have been bored out of their minds. Some of the panels looked really interesting, and someday I may try a con again either sans kids or with older kids who may want to see some of those things. But there were a lot of things I didn’t do, so I can’t quite give my full review of the con experience. Of course, I knew that going into it, so I wasn’t disappointed for missing what I planned to skip when I decided to bring my kids. 

In conclusion, here’s my biggest takeaways for bringing your kids to a Comic Con:

1. Don’t expect to do the same things you’d do without them. If you want to spend time with your kids by bringing them, you need to alter your plans and expectations to what they will enjoy.
2. Don’t plan to stay all day. The attention span for littler kids just isn’t there for that.
3. Make sure the con you are attending has some kid-friendly activities. If you don’t see much programming geared towards them, you might be better off not bringing them.

Adventure is Out--SQUIRREL!!!

If you’ve checked out some of my cosplay posts in the past, you may have noticed I’m a fan of Up’s lovable pup Dug. Fan is probably putting it lightly. So when Disney Plus announced that it was doing a series of shorts starring our favorite doggo, I got excited. This series is perfect for anyone who has a dog, had a dog, or loves watching dogs on Instagram.

Squirrel

The first short is just full of dog antics. Gotta wake Carl up, gotta get in his lap, gotta get in the way. He tries so hard to do the one thing Carl asked him to do… though he wrecks the flowerbed, gets stuck in the tree, and scares away the bird. Even when they end up in mischief, they’re good dogs and we’re lucky to have them. Like Dug says, “pretending to obey is hard.” I hear you, Dug. I hear you. But we can always do better tomorrow.

Puppies

This short could have been called “fatherhood in ten minutes”. The whole time Dug is playing defense with the visiting pups. Guard my stuff, get attacked, run away. Same way with my very active little girl: no climbing on the dishwasher, don’t pull my hair, etc. But you can never be too annoyed or stressed for too long. She flashes me that smile and she has me wrapped around her finger again. In the end, she needs guidance and love.

Smell

It’s all about finding joy in the simple things. Dug loves smelling the flowers, the dirt, everything. And in doing so, he was able to save a house from burning down (despite Carl thinking he was just up to mischief). Just goes to show that even when dogs seem to get into mischief, they’re good dogs.

Flowers

I always feel bad for dog owners during the fireworks season--which encompasses all of July in Utah. I know the scene in the living room and his crazy dream was meant to be comedic and everything, but I just felt so bad for Dug. I just wanted to give him a big hug (which I’ve done before). I’m glad he got the noise cancelling headphones in the end.

Science

Dug might be the most wholesome creature, but even he could use a lesson or two in empathy and communication. Russell’s science experiment gave Dug the opportunity to learn from the neighborhood animals. Despite his naivety, Dug learned compassion for the squirrel and the bird. The world needs more of that: compassion. We could all do with being a bit more like dogs.

With the passing of Carl’s voice actor, Ed Asner, I doubt we’ll get more of these Dug shorts. But I’m glad he could grace us with some wholesome entertainment. There’s a lot to be learned from Mr. Frederickson, Russell, and especially Dug, so I’m sure we’ll return to Paradise Falls again soon.

Adventure is out there! 

Can Superman teach me to be a super dad?

If you haven’t watched Superman & Lois, you’re missing out. Season one just finished this week, and I’m already feeling the loss that comes from a show ending. Hear me when I say this-- If the entire Arrowverse existed solely to bring us this version of Superman, it was all worth it. I definitely had tears in my eyes more than once. If you haven’t seen it yet, you can watch it all on The CW for free, or until it moves to HBO Max or Netflix… Feel free to read on, and I’ll tell you when the spoilers start after I get out of Episode 101.

I fell a little bit in love with Tyler Hoechlin’s Superman the moment he and Supergirl saved the Venture plane together. He only became better when we got to watch the ever stoic Cat Grant pine over him, with Clark being full aware of his ‘sway’ over her to the point of laughter. I realized quickly he was the best Superman out there (not to say it’s a contest, but if it were he’d be winning). He’s happy, strong, clumsy, and sincere. I also really think the entire cast is strong. There aren’t any weak players here. 

Along comes Superman & Lois. Not Lois & Clark (oh wait, they did that already..) Not just Superman, or Superman and the twins. Superman & *Lois* - I wondered about the reasoning here for longer than I should have, but I really think it’s about bringing the humanity out in Superman. 

In Episode 101 we get to see Clark and Lois’ relationship, only to find out that they now have twins - two teenage boys. One of the boys is Jonathan. He’s popular, athletic, and seems to have the perfect teenage life. The other is Jordan, who’s edgy, dark, and deals with Social Anxiety Disorder. He’s difficult to connect with, too. 

And so the story begins. Superman has the super game in the bag at this point, but parenting teenagers is a different story. I’ve literally never heard anyone say that’s easy, but imagine having to have a full-time job, be a good husband and father, AND be Superman to the entire planet. He would have to miss things, and he does. When the boys find out about their dad, they feel like they’ve been lied to their whole lives (you know… because they have been, even if it was the right call.) In one of my favorite clips from the series, Clark reveals himself to his sons.

Jordan: I understand. I understand all the excuses. All the times you were gone, you lied to us. You both did!

Lois: He was saving lives, Jordan!

Jordan: That doesn’t make it less true. You lied to protect his secret! All the things I’ve been feeling. You made me think I was crazy! They put me on pills!

Jordan then tells him he wasn’t sent to Earth to be a father. (ouch...) To be fair, when your father or mother misses something important to you, it still hurts, even if it was important. So, can Superman be a super father on top of all of the other things he’s doing? That’s a good question. It definitely doesn’t seem that way at first. 

But that’s kind of the point. No father is perfect, and each will definitely fail at points. It’s the effort, time, sacrifice, and love that does matter. 

I know a good man named Spencer who pointed out Superman symbolism, which is really about connecting to our Father in Heaven. He comes from a far away place, feeling like he doesn’t quite belong here. Over time he begins to try to find out who he is and goes to his Fortress of Solitude to *commune with his Father*. There his father (Jor-El) teaches him, trains him, empowers him, and sets him on a quest to save the world, serving, learning to love the people of this planet, and to find that love within himself. (I could literally teach a Sunday School lesson about this, and it would be so fun! I mean, the name El was used because it means God!)

*SPOILERS BELOW*

That example is quite starkly contrasted in the latter half of the season as we meet Tal-Rho’s holographic father Zeta Rho, who was abusive to Tal-Rho (Morgan Edge) from day one. Not only was he verbally abusive, he basically tortured the poor guy until he could withstand a great deal of pain. Should we be surprised when he gives in to that pressure? Abuse stays with you until you can be free of it, and heal from it.

The series just continues to focus on these father relationships:

• Lois with her father Sam, who she tells at one point to leave her family and not come back!

• Clark being a father to a son with powers, who struggles with them. And to somehow be a father to a son that doesn’t, who desperately wants to fit in with the two superhuman men in his life. 

• Kyle’s strained relationship with Lana and his children, who know he’s been a drunk but is really trying to figure himself out. He really blossoms in the last quarter after he begins to see how much he’s hurt his children.

• John Henry Irons, Steel, who happens to be from a parallel universe (I thought those were all erased… oh, well, this was fun). He happened to be married to Lois in that parallel universe, only to watch her be killed by Superman. His relationship with Natalie was beautiful, until he somehow got stuck in our universe and left her behind.

• It just keeps going! I mean, I had to make a chart to understand this:

I am focusing on fathers here, but Lois (Elizabeth Andrea "Bitsie" Tulloch) just shines. She’s the one that points out to Jonathan that they are a super family, doing super things even when half of them have powers and half of them don’t. She’s also the one fighting for Jordan with his anxiety and helping him work through that. 

At the end of the series, after things have calmed down, Clark’s family holds a funeral for Jor-El’s crystal, which was Jor-El as far as Clark knew. With the crystal destroyed, they bury the crystal and talk about fatherhood to wrap it all up.

Clark: Growing up I always felt different. Alone, in some way. (How are you not already crying by this point?! The strongest man on the planet, literally the man millions look up to, is talking about feeling different and alone!?) I had so many questions about who I was and why I was here. All that changed when I met him. He taught me so many things, about my home world, about my family, about myself. But the greatest thing he ever did for me… was just being my dad. (I’m like 99% sure this could have been an Elder Uchtdorf talk) - I also really believe that some dad's are adopted, as mentors, as father figures, or other men in our lives. We don't all have a father here, or maybe not a father that's able to be that person, but the good men in our lives can change us for the better.

So, Dads - Go be your own version of Superman. Your kids need it, even if that just means you being there for them when they aren’t ready. One day they will be, and they’ll be so grateful for someone who just wanted to be their dad.

- Garrett

Iroh vs Ozai: The Best Dad vs The Worst

Despite technically starting on the bad guy's side, Iroh has become a fan favorite from Avatar the Last Airbender. While he's as funny as he is powerful, the biggest thing that makes him so beloved is his relationship with his nephew Zuko and the father energy he provides the exiled prince. While this topic has been discussed at length, I think it's best we compare Iroh to Zuko's biological father, Fire Lord Ozai, and talk about what makes a good dad versus a bad dad. 

Sibling Rivalry   

Zuko's treatment by his father can also be contrasted with how his father treats Zuko's sister, Azula. This line says it all: "My father says Azula was born lucky, and that I was lucky to be born." Azula was always Ozai's favorite, both because she shared his killer instinct and was an extraordinary firebender. Ozai constantly compared Zuko to his sister, keeping the two in constant competition and conflict for Ozai's attention. We see this pattern play out in the MCU where Gamora is pitted against Nebula by their adopted father Thanos, and the devastation it causes both sisters. Nebula resents Gamora for being the better sister in their father's eyes and the punishment she received for not being like her, where Gamora is just thankful to not be her. 

Iroh never compared Zuko to Azula, and also never compared Zuko to his own deceased son. The entire time they chase Aang across the globe Iroh never once says that anyone could be doing a better job than Zuko, despite Zuko failing on numerous occasions. Iroh always held Zuko in his own light instead of comparing him to others, which allowed Zuko to shine in his own talents. When needs be Iroh would help Zuko with training or with direction, but always after Zuko came to him for help. 

Conditional Love

Ozai's love for his children was always based on what they could do, more specifically, what they could do to further his goals. Azula was the favorite because her power and ambition could help him take over more territory, as demonstrated when she successfully captured Ba Sing Se. Zuko internalized this and thus devoted himself to capture the avatar, a seemingly futile task, to not only restore his honor but prove to his father that he was worth loving. 

Iroh treated everyone he came across with respect and kindness, from strangers to enemies like Azula. Zuko never had to do anything to earn Iroh's love, it was always there, even when Zuko was too busy seeking Ozai's love to recognize it. Even when they are united near the finale (We'll talk about that in a sec) Iroh still loves Zuko, even though Zuko betrayed him and was responsible for his imprisonment. 

Forgivness

The first time we really learn anything about Ozai was when Zuko's scar is explained. After a disrespectful faux paus in Ozai's war room, Ozai publicly humiliates Zuko by burning the left side of his face, leaving him permanently scarred. As fire lord and Zuko's father, this situation could've been handled a dozen different ways. The public scarring was a demonstration that there would be no forgiveness for Zuko ever being anything less than what his father demanded of him. 

When Zuko and Iroh reunite in season three (See I told you we'd get back to this) it's after Zuko betrayed Iroh to the Fire Nation and his honor was restored by Ozai. Iroh escapes the same day Zuko renounces his father and leaves so it can be assumed that Iroh never knew that Zuko had lost favor with the fire lord again, or that Zuko had teamed up with Aang and the gang. Zuko doesn't see Iroh until Team Avatar meets with the Order of the White Lotus. When reunited, Zuko begs Iroh for forgiveness for betraying him, which Iroh never even held a grudge against him, but was "Just sad that you lost your way". Iroh allows Zuko to make mistakes even against him and still forgives and loves him with no question. If Zuko had just disappeared forever Iroh would've still forgiven him and been sad on how they last saw each other. 

This Father's Day, you don't have to celebrate the dad you have if that's not someone who is a positive influence in your life. As many geekdoms demonstrate, some families are made from people who love each other. So take time to celebrate the people who were fathers for you when nobody else was. 

-JOE

5 Reasons Homer Simpson is the Dad We Need

When the words "model TV dads" come by, you usually hear the dad from Leave It To Beaver, Andy Tailor, maybe more recently Danny Tanner from Full House. But if you want an example of a dad who is more realistic, look no further than Homer J. Simpson.

I'm serious.

5: Always Willing to Change

Homer's known for being pig-headed, stupid, and ignorant on most topics, but for Marge and the kids he's always willing to learn about something, even if it's just enough to get by. After taking a test that indicates he may be a bad father, Homer gets closer to Bart as they build and race soapbox derby cars. Homer even goes as far as to ask Ned Flanders for parenting advice just to prove that he is a good dad and does care about his kids.

4: Stands By His Kids

In the episode "Lisa the Iconoclast" he helps Lisa as she tries to unravel a conspiracy around the town's founder, Jebediah Springfield. Even though Jebediah is a hero of Homer's, he's willing to hear his daughter out and help her get to the truth, even at the cost of his job as town crier. Homer could've easily jumped in with the mob against Lisa, a position even Marge takes, but instead he sticks by Lisa to the end, even supporting her decision in the end to not reveal the truth. Homer has also helped Bart fight off bullies, defended Lisa's beauty and has stood up to Marge on the few times when she's shown a lapse in judgment, like when she broke a promise to Lisa to make her a costume.

3: Willing To Teach

There's not much that Homer knows that's really of use to anyone, but the little he does have he's always eager to share with his kids. This includes giving Bart the tip that "When it comes to compliments, women are ravenous blood-sucking monsters always want'n more... more... MORE! And if you give it to them, you'll get plenty back in return.". It may not be accurate but it helped Bart in the moment and Marge and Lisa did appreciate the compliments. Homer's never afraid to bring his kids along on one of his zany adventures, and teach them some handy life lessons along the way.

2: Respects His Wife

Homer has argued with Marge, sometimes done things she doesn't approve of, like buying Lisa a horse or buying a gun, but in the end he always tries to respect Marge's opinion and never puts her down. He's completely devoted to making Marge and the kids happy, even if he has to grumble about it in the car. The pair have taught their kids that a perfect marriage doesn't need to involve perfect people, but it does involve mutual respect and caring. Yes Homer slips up, but he's always the first to apologize and make amends. 

1: He Does It For Her

In the episode "And Maggie Makes Three" Bart and Lisa ask why they're aren't any pictures of Maggie. The subsequent flashback story tells how Homer and Marge, fresh out of debt and at the time only having two children, decide that Homer can chase his dream job of working at the bowling alley. This comes crashing down when Marge announces he's pregnant and Homer has to go back to the nuclear power plant where Mr. Burns puts up a plaque that says "Don't Forget: You're Here Forever". Homer takes pictures of Maggie and arranges them to make the plaque say "Do it for her" so he always remembers why he's working so hard at a place he hates. Homer is shown to sometimes forget Maggie but when he's at work he never forgets what makes it all worthwhile. 

Homer is the dad we didn't want but the one we needed. 

-JOE

Father/Daughter Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine’s Day! I could spend this post talking about more awesome TV couples, but I’m gonna take a twist on it. While growing up, my wife loved that her parents made Valentine’s Day about more than just romantic love. This continued through college and then into her professional life, as her elementary school students give her cute little Valentines. And now that we have our little girl Lucy, I definitely have more on my mind than just my wife (make no mistake, I’m still getting my wife something for Valentine’s Day). So with Valentine’s Day today and Lucy’s baby blessing this Sunday at church, I’ve got father/daughter relationships on my mind. So in no specific order, here are some of my favorite father/daughter relationships in fandom.

Pete and Rose Tyler (Doctor Who)
The original Pete died when Rose was just a baby, as seen in Father’s Day. When the Ninth Doctor and Rose traveled back in time to see him, she ended up saving him and messing up the timeline. But then Pete made the greatest sacrifice a father can, literally giving his life for his daughter’s life. Later on when an AU Pete arrived, he saved Rose from oblivion and basically adopted her as his daughter in his universe.

Alan and Maria Jackson (Sarah Jane Adventures)
This Doctor Who spin-off had an interesting take on a father/daughter relationship. In the first episode, Maria and her dad moved in across from Sara Jane Smith after an interesting divorce. Throughout Season 1, Maria dealt with her mom, who is a bit of a narcissist. Her dad supports her and loves her throughout the whole ordeal, even after he discovers that Maria has been running around with Sarah Jane fighting aliens. He even helped a bit, all the way up until they moved to America. It was refreshing to see a good dad during a messy divorce, just trying to do his best.

Noah and Claire Bennet (Heroes)
“The Company” may have coerced Noah into the adoption in the first place, but Noah became an ideal father for Claire over the years. There were definitely times that their relationship was strained, usually when Noah started lying to his family again and again. But Claire and Noah always reconciled. When it came down to it, Noah’s priority was definitely his family, even to the point of going on the run from “The Company” to keep Claire safe.

Emma and Charming (Once Upon a Time)
Being the same age post-curse, Charming didn’t exactly have a lot of opportunities for traditional parenting. That being said, he definitely made those moments happen still. Typically it came out when it pertained to Emma’s romantic life (especially with Hook) and her grief (losing Henry or Neal’s death, but some of my favorite father/daughter moments with Charming and Emma were when she was hurting and her father was the one who rushed to comfort her. Also, let’s just talk for a second about how awesome it was to see Charming fight to save newborn Emma.

Hank Pym and Hope Van Dyme (Ant-Man)
After the death of her mother, Hope’s relationship with her father was immediately strained and it never really recovered until after he told her the truth during the events of Ant-Man. Between the events of that film and its sequel, Hank and Hope obviously reconciled and pooled their intelligence to rescue Janet from the Quantum Realm. Seeing them work together so flawlessly in Ant-Man and the Wasp was a beautiful sight. I love that movie in general, but the father/daughter relationship was definitely a highlight among the rest of it.

Phil Coulson and Daisy Johnson (Agents of SHIELD)
From the very beginning, Coulson had a special relationship with Skye/Daisy. As things progressed, especially in Season 2 as Daisy met her parents, Coulson definitely became a pseudo-father to her. With how Jekyll/Hyde her birth father was, it only made Daisy cling harder to Coulson. After letting her father go, she didn’t have a father anymore per se, except for Coulson. So it was natural that when Daisy needed guidance, she ran to Coulson. Unfortunately, that also meant that Daisy was the most heartbroken (except maybe for Agent May) when Coulson was dying.

Wilf Mott and Donna Noble (Doctor Who)
Donna had a great father growing up, from what we know. However, after her father, Geoff Noble, died, her grandfather Wilf really stepped up and became the prime father figure to her. Despite her mother’s taunting and criticism, Grandpa Wilf never ceased to encourage Donna to follow her dreams and her passions, even when it meant that she traveled with the Doctor to potentially life-threatening worlds. It was also Wilf who was there for her after the Doctor wiped her memory, watching out for her since the Doctor couldn’t.

Quentin Lance and Laurel Lance-2 (Arrow)
Two years after the death of his daughter Laurel on Earth-1, Quentin was “reunited” with a version of her from Earth-2. This alternate-universe Laurel was a villainous lackey when we first met her. However, over time with her new “father” she changed. Even after Quentin’s death, Laurel-2 continued to honor his memory by fighting the bad guys and continuing to change, even when the world thought she was a lost cause. Her new father’s encouragement changed her for the better and made her into a new hero Laurel.

Shawn Hunter and Maya Hart (Girl Meets World)
When we left off Shawn Hunter at the end of Boy Meets World, he was single and living life. When Girl Meets World picked up, Shawn was nowhere to be seen, but when he came back into Cory and Topanga’s life, she quickly took a liking for their daughter Riley’s best friend Maya. At first it was just a matter of affection, as Maya’s family life reminded Shawn of his own. Later on, as Shawn got to know Maya and her mom, it became about family, as Shawn married Maya’s mom. As a pseudo-father or a step-father, Shawn was amazing with Maya, treating her as though she were his daughter. Eventually that happened, as he adopted Maya in the series finale.

Honorable Mentions:
There are so many other father/daughter combos that I wish I could include. This post would be forever long if I included them all. But here are a few honorable mentions. Cory and Riley, Rory and River, Joe and Iris, Jack and Monica, Tony and Morgan, Scott and Cassie

I hope you have a great Valentine's Day, however you spend it. Personally, I have an 8-week old date that I can't wait to snuggle.

Top TV Dads

Happy Father's Day! To complement my Mother's Day post from last month, I wanted to do a Top TV Dads. Too often fathers are degraded and viewed as unimportant in the media, so let's celebrate the ones who were actually good.

Takehiro Matsuki (Digimon Tamers)
To be fair, he was a bit of a permissive dad at times, seeming to want to appease his son Takato. However, he also proved to be a big support throughout the season. When Takato's mom was frantic about the Digimon, Takehiro was level-headed and trusted Takato to be safe and smart and mature. Even before he knew about the Digimon, Takato was seen having a friendly, healthy relationship with father, talking to him about school and everything.

Prince Charming (Once Upon a Time)
He missed the first 28 years of his daughter's life due to a magically-induced coma, but after the curse was broken he strived his hardest to be a good father to Emma. He struggled with the idea of having another child, causing him great fear, but he seemingly conquered that fear (despite leaving Neal behind during various adventures). Despite being the same age physically as his daughter, he and Emma were shown to have many heart-to-heart moments, including when she was grieving over the loss of her boyfriend.

Joe West (The Flash)
Let's start with the fact that he was a single father after his wife walked out on him. For years he cared for Iris on his own, being a solid male influence in her life, leading to healthy dating relationships for Iris. Now let's fast-forward to when he became foster-dad for Barry, after the death of his mother and incarceration of his father. Sure the transition was bumpy, but he developed a great relationship with Barry, supporting him, even though he didn't understand Barry's wild tales about the Man in Yellow. Their relationship was solid enough that Barry brought him on to Team Flash not long after donning the red suit. Finally, decades after his wife left, he met his son Wally. It was rough at first, trying to parent too fast, but after slowing it down, Joe was able to be a solid influence for Wally as he became Kid Flash.

Jack Geller (Friends)
While his wife is a piece of work, Jack was very compassionate and loving towards his two kids. Granted, sometimes this compassion bordered on cluelessness. While his wife was a bit more nasty towards Monica, his negligence was a bit more passive. All the same, despite his faults, he genuinely loves his children. No moment portrays this more than when he came to comfort Monica after her break-up with Richard.

Cory Matthews (Girl Meets World)
After seven seasons of life lessons of his own (plus 14 unseen years), Cory became a bit of a mix of his young adult self, his father, and Mr. Feeny. Not only was a loving father (albeit crazy and quirky) to his own children, but as a teacher he was also a father-figure to some of his daughter's friends, especially Maya. Like Mr. Feeny before him, he tried to teach life lessons all the way along through middle school and into high school.

Pete Tyler (Doctor Who)
We've got two incarnations of this character to look at, both amazing fathers. The original Pete, Rose's biological father, was a bit of a clever airhead, schemes running through his head and driving his wife crazy (not that she needed help). When adult Rose showed up suddenly with the Ninth Doctor, he was willing to sacrifice himself to set the timeline straight, all for the sake of his daughter. Now jump to the parallel universe, Pete Tyler never fathered Rose, but he became the adoptive father for her after the Battle of Canary Warf. During the battle, he risked his life to save Rose from falling into the void, despite the risks to the universe.

Solomon Moto (Yu-Gi-Oh!)
We don't particularly know what happened with Yugi's parents (his mom briefly appeared in a Japanese episode once), but Grandpa Moto seemed to raise Yugi through his teenage years (if not even earlier). Despite all the crazy battle (and all the times his soul was trapped), Solomon stuck it out for his grandson and his friends. Perhaps it was his understanding of the Egyptian origins of it all, but he was surprisingly trusting of Yugi running into battle at least half a dozen times between Battle City and the Memory World.

Who's your favorite TV dad?