Life is Pain

    At my uncle’s funeral, his son shared that the last words he heard from his Dad while beginning the drive back home (his Dad would pass unexpectedly a few hours later necessitating a drive back to his parent’s home) were “Have fun storming the castle.” These are the iconic words spoken by Billy Crystal as “Miracle Max” as he wishes Fenzinni the giant and Inigo Montoya the Spaniard farewell after helping them to revive the “mostly dead” man in black, Westley. 

    Hearing this at my uncle’s funeral has caused me to reflect on another classic one liner from “The Princess Bride.” The line comes near the beginning of the film when the man in black and Princess Buttercup are running away from Prince Humperdink. The Princess is bemoaning her fate and mourning the loss of her true love and expresses something about the pain she is feeling. The man in black (her true love Westley in disguise, though she doesn’t know it yet) replies, rather harshly, “Life is pain, highness! Anyone who says differently is selling something.” I thought of this line while at work where I was privy to hearing about the physical pains of physical therapy patients in addition to hearing about some of their emotional and mental pains as well. I also thought about this phrase while listening to General Conference talks from leaders of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who have not been spared the pains of life. President Nelson has lost 2 daughters and his first wife to death. Sister Amy Wright battled cancer. Elder Soares’ wife delivered a premature child who died. Elder Dieter F Uchtdorf had to flee his home twice as a refugee. President Eyring, President Holland, and President Oaks have all lost spouses. Just to mention a few of the well known pains suffered by leaders of the church. Additionally, you have your individual pains that you suffer from. Perhaps it’s back pain, or leg pain, or surgical pain. Perhaps it’s the pain of losing a loved one. Perhaps it’s the pain of heartbreak or loneliness or depression or some other mental health condition. At some point in life, we all experience the truth that “life is pain.” The great news is that we don’t have to suffer alone nor does the pain have to be our identity. There are eternal truths that can help us during moments of pain. The first is from a classic primary hymn: “I am a child of God.” He is aware of you and me and everyone who is experiencing a moment of life’s pain. Second from Elder Brook P. Hales in October of 2024: “Mortality Works.” I love the story he shares about his  deceased mother: 

“My mother did not have an easy journey through mortality. She received no accolades or worldly honors and did not have educational opportunities beyond high school. She contracted polio as a child, resulting in a lifetime of pain and discomfort in her left leg. As an adult, she experienced many difficult and challenging physical and financial circumstances but was faithful to her covenants and loved the Lord.

When my mother was 55, my next older sister passed away, leaving an eight-month-old baby daughter, my niece, motherless. For various reasons, Mom ended up largely raising my niece for the next 17 years, often under very trying circumstances. Yet, notwithstanding these experiences, she happily and willingly served her family, neighbors, and ward members and served as an ordinance worker in the temple for many years. During the last several years of her life, Mom suffered from a form of dementia, was often confused, and was confined to a nursing facility. Regrettably, she was alone when she passed away unexpectedly.

Several months after her passing, I had a dream I have never forgotten. In my dream, I was sitting in my office at the Church Administration Building. Mom entered the office. I knew she had come from the spirit world. I will always remember the feelings I had. She did not say anything, but she radiated a spiritual beauty that I had never before experienced and which I have difficulty describing.

Her countenance and being were truly stunning! I remember saying to her, “Mother, you are so beautiful!,” referencing her spiritual power and beauty. She acknowledged me—again without speaking. I felt her love for me, and I knew then that she is happy and healed from her worldly cares and challenges and eagerly awaits “a glorious resurrection.” I know that for Mom, mortality worked—and that it works for us too.”

   

     Finally, in Moses 1:39 we read, “For behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.” Heavenly Father is our loving father! He is aware of everything we go through and knows that what we experience will prepare us and help us in our eternal journey. So perhaps the next time you are struggling or experiencing a moment of life’s pain, take comfort and remember these words from Elder Klebingat, “I understand, Lord. I know what this is. A time to prove myself, isn’t it?” Then partner with Him to endure well to the end.” 

    

    "Life is pain highness," but we can know that this pain is part of our story which helps in our eternal journey.