The Bad Batch Series Finale

(Guest post by Ben)

NOTE: This article contains spoilers for The Bad Batch. You’ve been warned.

Clone Force 99 came to us at the end of Clone Wars, fulfilling a niche purpose that, as far as I was concerned, was finished when that series ended. But Dave Filoni had other ideas, and The Bad Batch gave us three glorious seasons of good soldiers who didn’t always follow orders. With the series finale a good month behind us (as of this writing), it’s given me some time to reflect on the emotional rollercoaster that was The Bad Batch.

When we lost Tech in Season 2, I realized that all bets were off. Who else of Clone Force 99 could be taken from us? I know—knew—Omega wouldn’t make it. She was going to die in a blaze of glory saving her brothers. If not, then Crosshair would die in a blaze of glory saving Omega. Regardless, someone was going to die in a blaze of glory.

As it turns out, nobody else did. And yet, the tension of knowing it could happen kept me rooted to my seat. Because, you know what? I liked these characters. I was attached to them. So knowing they could be killed of was emotional enough. I’m not sad they survived, though. In fact, I’m relieved. I’m also excited that Omega grew up and went to fight with the Rebellion. Does that mean we could see her in a live-action film or show later on? That would be awesome. 

The series finale also brought some fun Easter eggs, such as the Zillo beast. First appearing in Clone Wars, it was kind of a throw-away monster—a cool one, yes, but it died with a random mention by Mr. Palpatine that it should be cloned. Well, after many years, we finally saw it again in Season 3. And, while not necessarily unique to the series finale, seeing the workings of Mount Tantiss was super cool. That mountain was first mentioned in Heir to the Empire by Timothy Zahn, published way back in 1991. I love that Dave Filoni canonizes those bits of “legends” that we once knew and loved. They could have had that facility anywhere, but, blessed be the Force, they chose Tantiss. 

Speaking of the Zillo beast, they did use it as a narrative turbo boost to help Hunter and the others get in. I’m OK with that. I mean, it’s a short episode. Once inside, the CX troopers attack and, ultimately, capture our heroes. Yes, Hunter and the others are so good at what they do, but they’re outnumbered, injured, and probably a bit constipated, too. That takes a toll on a battle-hardened veteran.

Constipation aside, Hunter et al. needed to be out of the picture so Omega could shine. She is no princess in distress; rather, she is a capable kid, and this is, ultimately, her story. Omega breaks out, and Omega saves the kids. (And dang, the fact that there were kid prisoners being tested really hits the feels.) Omega is a hero, which we see more of during the epilogue when she goes out on her own. In a world where we are always looking for more strong female main characters, why aren’t more people talking about Omega?

The Bad Batch was always something I looked forward to after a long day (week) of work. If you’ve read this article and think, “Man, this guy’s delusion; doesn’t he hate anything?”, the answer is...not really. I do recognize that the show wasn’t perfect, and that some arcs were slower than others. But what we got from The Bad Batch heavily outweighs any possible complaints. I mean, having Ventress show up and work with Omega? That’s awesome! It’s the small things in life, folks, that make Star Wars what it is. It’s a space opera, and as such, isn’t to be taken as “hard” science fiction. Now that the series is over, though, I’m back to not watching TV...although The Acolyte is just around the corner! 

Ahsoka: (Re)Opening the Door to Adventure

(Guest post by Ben)

The following is a review of the Ahsoka series. As such, expect spoilers. You have been warned.

Ahsoka Tano was my absolute least favorite character in Star Wars when she was first introduced in Clone Wars. As the series went on, her character grew on me in such a way that, when she walked away from the Jedi Order, I was crushed. She had an emotional arc, and more opportunities presented itself during her appearances on Rebels (her fight with Vader was just…wow!). Needless to say, news of an Ahsoka series got me excited, and I’m happy to report that season 1 did not disappoint. 

Season 1 of Ahsoka (or what I like to call Rebels Season 5) saw the return of some favorite characters, such as Sabine, Chopper, and even a cameo from C-3PO. But it was Thrawn I was waiting for. I wanted, more than anything, for a live-action Grand Admiral Thrawn.

And we got it. 

Some of the best moments in Ahsoka were with Thrawn. His cruel brilliance is always fun to watch, and knowing his character, I can’t help but wonder about everything he’s planning on doing and how everything will tie together in ways I have not expected. Having read all of the Thrawn books by Timothy Zahn (both Legends and canon), I found it exciting at mere mentions of things pulled from the books (i.e., his knowledge of Anakin Skywalker). There are certainly a rampant amount of fan theories circulating the Internet about what Thrawn is up to, but I won’t get into those. I just want to say how happy I am that Thrawn is still around, and I hope to one day see the Chiss Ascendency from which he hails. 

And then there was Anakin. Dave Filoni has done a remarkable job in creating likable characters. Take Ahsoka, for instance. But remember the Prequel Trilogy? Folks didn’t take a huge liking to Hayden Christensen’s acting as Anakin Skywalker. In Filoni’s hands, Anakin came back with a flourish, an on-screen performance that, in some eyes, was redeeming. Whether his character needed “redemption” or not is irrelevant; however, Christensen’s performance in the Ahsoka series was both fun and nostalgic, and a welcome return to the Clone Wars era. His scenes also included some of the best visuals and imagery in the show. 

Another highlight from the Ahsoka series is getting to see Jabba the Hutt again, although he’s a lot skinnier than he was in Return of the Jedi. In all seriousness though, Ezra Bridger was an all-star in Rebels whose character grew on me until he, too, became a favorite. The actor portraying Ezra (Eman Esfandi) did a phenomenal job at encapsulating his personality and energy. I chuckled at his antics. It’s good to have Ezra back.

One thing that was a little weird was Sabine’s padawan status. According to the Tenth Doctor…er, Huyang, Sabine was least fit of any candidates he’d ever known to become a Jedi—and he’d been around for centuries! I thought Sabine’s character was strong when she wasn’t considered Force sensitive. As such, I found her Jedi potential a weak character arc. But, we’ll see where it goes (I’m not entirely opposed just yet).

Speaking of Jedi, Baylan Skoll was, perhaps, most compelling character in the series. What is his goal? Why search for the Mortis gods on Peridea? At least, that’s what it looked like from the massive Argonath-esque statues we last saw him standing on. The Father, Son, and…where was the Daughter? Hmm… It’s a mystery, and one that obviously ties in with the cartoons. I need answers!

I won’t say much about Baylan’s apprentice, Shin Hati, other than I enjoyed her power-hungry character and fierce personality. Her path seems clouded, but is obviously going to play a large role in the future of the story.

All in all, I thought Ahsoka was a fantastic show. Star Wars is all about fun and adventure, and this series re-opens the door that the original series introduced. New planets, new (old) foes, and a mystery doubtless contained within the realms of the storyline, the adventure seems more dire than even Starkiller Base posed in The Force Awakens.

Ironically, Ahsoka herself was one of my least-favorite characters in the show (although I still enjoyed her performance). Still, there’s a lot to love in Ahsoka. From zombie stormtroopers (no, this is not the first time zombies have been portrayed in Star Wars media) to Thrawn’s machinations, Ahsoka is a fun romp that expands the universe by introducing another galaxy far, far away…

The Real Secret Invasion was my Expectations

Back when I watched Earth’s Mightiest Heroes, I looked forward to the Secret Invasion saga, as my brother had told me about it. There were some parts I thought could have been better, but overall I enjoyed it. So when Marvel announced they were doing a Disney Plus series for Secret Invasion, I was excited and immediately expected greatness. That was my first mistake. Expectations.

I’ve said in previous Marvel reviews (like Love and Thunder, for example) that the reason people like to complain about what Marvel puts out is because of their own expectations. Never having read the comics, I’ve been free to enjoy the content of She-Hulk, WandaVision, and other post-Endgame epics without comparing them to the source content. But with Secret Invasion, I had Earth’s Mightiest Heroes to compare.

I guess there were just a few parts of the version I’d seen that felt integral to the story, but weren’t present in the MCU. For example, I remember it being a much bigger deal in Earth's Mightiest Heroes to find the missing heroes. There was a whole saga of trying to find the real Cap and everyone. Of course they wouldn’t use Steve Rogers on this one, but they could have easily used Rhodey. We also didn’t get Fury’s Secret Warriors. Come on! Where’s my girl Quake? I had seen theories that Daisy Johnson would become Fury’s right hand after Hill’s death, but nope.

But again. Expectations. If I’d never seen Earth’s Mightiest Heroes (or if I’d been able to let go of my expectations) maybe I’d have enjoyed the MCU version more. As a spy thriller, it was intriguing and engaging. The conspiracy and uncertainty kept me coming back each week. I loved how they explained what Fury has been up to since the Blip. That being said, he was a different kind of Fury and I’m still not sure if I like the change. The only part of the spy thriller aspect that I have an honest issue with is the final battle.

So G'iah ended up being Super Skrulled and fighting Gravik. The fight itself was actually pretty great. But it started suddenly and ended pretty abruptly. For how much build-up there was, I expected it to last longer I guess. Meanwhile, Fury talks his way out of the stand-off with the President… and then the President decides to turn the country (and probably a good chunk of the world) against the Skrulls. And we still don’t have confirmation of a season 2. Or a movie sequel. It could have led into an “Avengers: Secret Invasion” film. Instead, we had one or two named characters as Skrulls and then we wrapped up the story.

No “Avengers: Secret Invasion” on the horizon as far as I know. Just Kang Dynasty and Secret Wars… I’ve seen Secret Wars in the 90s Spider-Man series and in Disney’s Avengers Assemble. I’ll start now to keep my expectations down. I mean I suppose we'll get G'iah and Sonya teaming up at some point.

I just have one question: How long were Ross and Rhodey in there?

For the Love of Star Wars, End The Mandalorian

**Minor Spoilers**

Image: WorthPoint

There comes a point where every series should end. Yet the studio continues to produce more of the show to make money, even though the overall story ended seasons ago. Common shows that fit this category are Greys Anatomy, The Simpsons, Psych, Chuck, and Law and Order. We should want The Mandalorian to end here at season 3 and have Disney explore more of the Star Wars universe.  

The Mandalorian has been one of the most successful Star Wars series that Disney has made and if they continue it will surely become disappointing. Season 3 has received the lowest score yet with a 50% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes, while the previous seasons scored in the 90’s. It's time to end the series.

Gotye's Hit Parodied With 'Star Wars That I Used to Know'

As you may have gathered I did not like season 3 of The Mandalorian. I was quite bored with a few of the episodes and at one point I asked myself: “why am I watching the series?”, “do I even like Star Wars anymore?”, “what happened to Star Wars that I used to know?” Some of you may like what Disney has been doing with Star Wars and that is OK. You can have a different opinion than mine. To me I have either A) changed my tastes and I only like the older movies for nostalgic reasons, B)  the new series is missing what made the original great, or C) a mixture of both.

Two episodes made me cringe the most and they were episode 3 (chapter 19) where we follow imperials in the New Republic trying to adapt, and episode 6 (chapter 22) “Guns for Hire” where Jack Black, Lizzo, and Christopher Lloyd played themselves ruling over a planet; they hired Djin Djarin to solve a mystery about imperial droid malfunction. Without going into too many details I felt that these two episodes felt out of place and were the worst episodes of the season. I can't even decide which one was worse, they were both so bad. Episode 3 had nothing to do with the plot of the series, but attempted to set up for a potential series that was cancelled before it even began called “Rangers of the New Republic”--- so that episode was a waste. I didn’t like episode 6 for similar reasons; it felt out of place. Having those quest stars made it feel like a cameo ploy more than a plot to the story. It felt forced and I was bored watching it; even though the premise of the episode was interesting, it failed due to the cameos. 

After finishing this season, I thought this would be a decent conclusion to this series but then after a quick google search I found out that Jon Favreau, the showrunner, has confirmed that there will be a season 4. At the end of season 3 there are some easter egg mysteries that can be solved, but it finishes with a happy ending. Din Djarin and the other Mandalorians are content, Grogu ends up being adopted, and Moff Gideon has been axed for the 3^rd time. Great place to stop with Moff Gideon gone. Since there is another season I bet he will return. . . . again.

Image of Thrawn by Del Rey

When I found out that he was the antagonist again this season I was confused. Moff Gideon isn’t really a threat to Din Djarin because he keeps being defeated by him every season. He reminds me of Palpatine returning in Rise of Skywalker. At that point Palpatine returning was not threatening since he was defeated so easily by Darth Vader in Return of the Jedi. However, in Revenge of the Sith, Palpatine was fearsome because we knew he was going to win and take over the galaxy and we wanted to see how he would accomplish it. In this season they alluded to Admiral Thrawn coming back who is a threat because, unlike Moff Gideon, he wins against the protagonists, watch Star Wars Rebels for evidence or read some of the cannon/non-cannon books. 

I think this is the most optimal place to end the series. It doesn’t mean that this is the end of us seeing Din Djarin, Grogu, and Bo-Katan. They should show up in other series and play supporting characters. I mentioned earlier how there are some things that haven’t been fully examined and that’s fine. It teases the audience to search for the meaning of those easter eggs. Disney should have those nuggets explained in different series. They aren’t crucial for this series to explore them. It’s important for a certain character to be involved, but that person can show up in different series.

Moff Gideon

I think I have ranted enough about this. Disney should end The Mandalorian here. I would be happy if it got cancelled but since it brings in money, I don’t see the series ending here. I expect that season 4 antagonist will be Moff Gideon, sadly, but I don’t know what else they can explore with this series. I think that season 4 will be the worst season of The Mandalorian but, on the bright side, it will still be better than the most recent trilogy of Star Wars (episodes 7-9).

The Bad Batch Season 2

(Guest post by Ben)

What adult in their right mind watches cartoons? I mean, they’re for kids, right? Obviously, you’ve never watched The Bad Batch, and Season 2 reinforced that sentiment. While it is technically a kid’s show, there is a lot to love as an adult. If you think about it, that’s what Star Wars is at its heart, and it’s what makes The Bad Batch such a fun and engaging experience for any age. But instead of going down that route, however, let’s look at why Bad Batch Season 2 is essentially mandatory viewing. 

As we continue on with this article, keep in mind that there may very well be spoilers for season 2 of The Bad Batch. 

The Bad Batch has some rather heavy emotional moments that bind the characters with the viewers. Wrecker’s bond with Omega is beyond sweet, and Hunter’s fatherly nature toward her is likewise endearing. But it’s more than that; these characters go through a lot, and it’s things we can also relate to. For example, Hunter thinks it’s about time to settle down somewhere safe for Omega to grow up and have a childhood. While we love the adventures, we also want Omega to be happy and care-free. We also loathe Crosshair for his betrayal in season 1, but Omega is incredibly forgiving and I, for one, am forced to agree with her simply by her sheer force of caring.

As heartwarming as those moments are, however, it’s the characters’ sacrifices that really drive the nail home. Tech’s sacrifice for Omega and the others hit deep. I knew what was going to happen—I saw the foreshadowing and felt the moment approach—and I kept thinking to myself: No, don’t do it. Please, don’t do it. 

And then he did it. 

Tech was never my favorite of the Batch, but he still grew on me, and his loss stung deep. Cid’s betrayal, too, caused me some serious emotion. I felt angry, as if she had betrayed me, as well. Which, of course, she had, since I was by then deeply invested in the story and with the heroes. 

Aside from toying with our emotions, Bad Batch season 2 gave us more insight into the post Order 66 era of the Empire. There is some seriously shady stuff going on behind the scenes, and we, as the viewers, are becoming privy to it. We’ve seen recently in The Mandalorian that the Empire had been involved in some…iffy cloning projects. In season two of The Bad Batch, we’re getting more information regarding that iffy stuff. We still don’t know exactly what’s going on, but it can’t be good if Omega is being kidnapped (spoilers) and brought to a super-secret location. Personally, my money is on all this having to do with the creation of Snoke (or what will eventually be Snoke), and if so, The Bad Batch is going to be a massive strength to The Last Jedi and even, possibly, The Rise of Skywalker.

In fact, the next—and final—season of Bad Batch is sure to uncover loads of secrets, Easter eggs, and, most likely, heartbreak. Something tells me Clone Force 99 isn’t going to survive an extended campaign. Tech is gone (spoilers), Crosshair looks to be on the verge of death, and it’s difficult to see a happy ending. Clone Wars ended in heartbreak, and I expect the same with Bad Batch. Part of me hopes that Hunter and the crew settle down on Pabu (the Polynesian-like island) with Omega. She deserves happiness, and she certainly seemed happy there. Without the crew, however, it just won’t be the same. I have a sinking feeling that Wrecker will be the next casualty, as he seems to be the closest to Omega, and it would have the biggest impact. But, only time will tell. Fingers crossed that there won’t be too many tears.

The Star Wars universe is expanding more so than ever with the new TV shows, and The Bad Batch is proving to be a valuable source of information for those in need of all the details. Sure, there are some fluff episodes, but they’re still fun and do provide some valuable character development. Besides, you never know when those “fluff” moments will take a 180 turn and become more meaningful than first expected. I am eager to see The Bad Batch series play out, as it is becoming more and more apparent that Clone Force 99 is heading toward secrets that have been only minimally hinted at. There’s always another secret (Thanks, Kelsier), and I need answers.

The Enchanting Disenchanted

Even though that I enjoyed this movie the average score I gave this movie is a 4.5/10. Where 1 is an awful movie that I regret watching, 5 is average, and 10 is the best movie I have ever seen. Disenchanted scored below average.

Plot: 5/10

The plot is average. From the trailer we know that Giselle and her family move to a new home and life is not as a fairy tale that Giselle hoped for. After Prince Edward and Nancy gave her, an Andalasia wishing wand she uses it to have a fairy tale life. While everything starts out well for her, she becomes more wicked because no stepmother is nice. The rest of the movie focuses on accepting our circumstances and undoing the spell with so many references to Disney princesses’ films, which was fun to tally.

To me I thought this was an interesting take on a story and would have given it a higher rating, however Robert’s arc is lame. Before Giselle makes the wish, we see the daunting trail that Robert is making for his family, but never becomes resolved. Instead, when the world becomes a fairy tale, he goes through a midlife crisis which came out of nowhere and he never contributed to the main plot. While in the fairy tale era he is hardly ever with Giselle.

Acting: 7/10

The actors did a phenomenal job in this movie. You can tell that most actors were enjoying their roles. I will just highlight a few actors that stood out to me.

James Marsden (Prince Edward): You may know him as the original cyclops in X-Men or you may have seen him in Sonic the Hedgehog movie as Tom. After watching this movie, I realized how underappreciated he is. He played Prince Edwards with such enthusiasm you can tell that he enjoyed playing Prince Edward. The only downside is that I wish he was in the movie more.

Amy Adams (Giselle): Her performance was outstanding. Like James Marsden you can tell that she is enjoying her time playing Giselle. She does a great job being sweet and caring and she makes a believable evil stepmother. She does the squint with her eyes throughout the movie that makes you know that she believes that you are inferior to her when she is evil. I loved watching her perform in this movie.

Maya Rudolph (Malvina Monroe): Princess Disney movies usually have one villain, and, in this movie, there are two Maya being the main antagonist of the movie. In the real world she plays an overbearing mother that likes control and after the wish is made by Giselle, she become the wicked queen. She convinced me that she enjoyed bossing her coworkers around.

Music: 2/10

Usually in musicals you want the tune to be catchy and the lyrics to be understood and repeatable. The catchier the song the more popular they will become. Alan Menken who is known to compose Disney classics like The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, and Pocahontas composed the music for this movie. Unlike the movies that were previously mentioned the music in this movie was not as great as his other works. Most of the songs were hard to interpret, and the music wasn’t catchy except for one song.

“Badder” was the best song in the movie. The lyrics was memorable by repeating fictious song title “badder”. The song was catchy and Amy Adams and Maya Rudolph did a brilliant job performing and singing this song. By the end of the song, I didn’t know who was badder, but I wouldn’t want to ever get on their bad sides.

Effects: 4/10

I think the effects was below average for Disney meaning the CGI looked not as realistic as it has been in other movies. However, this movie is supposed to be fairy tale, so the cheaper effects played well to allude to the fairy tale setting.

Cutting between scenes were good nothing stood out of place to me. I think the best cutting took place in the song “Badder”. The cutting between Giselle and Malvina in this song helped make this duet to be perfect. Both showing that these two are very similar to each other, but also giving a stark difference between the two by giving one a brighter tone color with the other having a dark tone.

Also, I should mention 90% of the dresses that Amy Adams wore were beautiful. I think my favorite it the peacock dress that she wore in "Badder". Disney should sell those dresses so I can get them for my spouse who would look better in them. 

Conclusion

I enjoyed this movie even though I didn’t give the movie high marks doesn’t mean that it was not fun to watch. Most of the actors seemed to enjoy playing their role. All actors from the first movie returned to be in this movie after 15 years from the first being made. I believe all those that are on the fence about watching this movie will enjoy it especially if you are a Disney fan. I personally enjoyed spotting all Disney references throughout the movie.

Yondu Stole Christmas?

Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas special follows the same troupes that we enjoy from previous movies but is not memorable. Don’t get me wrong I enjoyed what I watched, and it helped me realize that I have forgotten a lot from the previous volumes like Mantis being Peter's sister. Even though I enjoyed that this movie focuses more on two of the funniest characters Mantis and Drax there was nothing special stood out to me like some of the better Marvel movies.

The story starts off with a flash back of Peter in his youth wanting to celebrate Christmas. Yondu, being the grinch, stole his Christmas. Then the special transition to the present to Mantis hearing this story and wants to give her brother his best Christmas ever by bring him his hero; Kevin Bacon. Drax comes along with her as the kidnap Kevin Bacon for Quill.

Comedy:

Like all Guardians of the Galaxy the comedy of the movie is a highlight. I enjoyed Mantis and Drax dynamics. Watching them is like playing with your favorite sibling. You know that they are going to get into trouble, and they are going to enjoy every minute of it until they are caught.

When Drax and Mantis fly to earth everyone is staring at them and Mantis gets upset that Drax did not turn on the cloaking device on the ship that she told him to do. I think I enjoyed this scene because it showed that their relationship is not romantic, but more of a sibling relationship with one being serious while the other one is enjoying pushing buttons.

The best comedic moment was after they captured Kevin Bacon; Mantis and Drax find out that Kevin Bacon is not the hero Quill made him out to be, he has the most abdominal job being an actor. When they find this out, they are disgusted with him, and brain wash him to be the hero that Quill described him as.

Music:

There were a couple of Christmas songs that were made for the special. I liked the first song called “I Don’t Know What Christmas Is” because it’s an interpretation of what skeptical people would deduce if they heard about Santa Claus for the first time. 

He’s a master burglar

A pro at pickin’ locks

If you don’t leave milk and cookies out

He will put dung in your socks

The other song that was sung by Kevin Bacon called “Here it is Christmas time” and it was not as clever as the previous song. It is a more serious song, but it felt out of place due to the comedic nature that this series brings. It’s like taking Netflix’s Daredevil series which has a serious tone and making it into a comedy . . . .

Plot:

The plot of the movie is nothing special. I believe the producers intended it to be this way so nothing substantial is missed if people chose to skip it and watch the the 3rd volume that is coming out next year.

Like I mentioned at the beginning of this post, the plot of the movie is Mantis wanting to give Peter Quill a special Christmas. She thinks that Peter would reject her if she told him her secret about being his sibling. So, she sets off to bring him Kevin Bacon for Christmas.

All in all, this was a not a special special. There was one good song and a couple of good laughs, but it is not the best that guardians of the galaxy have shown us. If you have an hour to waste and you want to watch something new, then give this a shot or watch a new show. Watching this made me excited for the next volume to come out next year because I know that it is going to be better than this.

Don’t Watch Pinocchio. Watch Pinocchio Instead!

(Guest post by Kobe)

These days, it feels as if every new movie needs to be connected to some previous film to be successful. Prequels, sequels, remakes, and spinoffs plague the movie theater screen and every single streaming service. So far this year, the top three grossing movies at the box office have been Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, Jurassic World Dominion, and in first place, Top Gun Maverick. What do they all have in common? They’re all sequels. Even though these movies are occasionally decent or even good, the industry’s growing dependence on franchise films and remakes and the growing departure from original stories and unique films is enough to make a movie lover, such as myself, very cynical. If you’re anything like me, you get upset every time the next live-action Disney remake gets announced or released. No movie has done that quite like Pinocchio has.

Disney’s Pinocchio (2022) is a bad movie. At this point most, if not all, people can agree on that. It earned an abysmal 27% on rotten tomatoes, with it earning a similar 29% audience score. Critics gave the movie generally unfavorable reviews, with Alex Godfrey from Empire Magazine saying that “[Pinocchio] feels like an exercise. It exists because it can.” I watched the movie to see what all the fuss was about, and yes, the film completely deserves all the negative criticism it’s received. The movie feels lazy and passionless. The CGI looks gross and unpolished, the voice acting is passable at best, and the emotion and meaning of the story falls incredibly flat. You would think that with all this negativity surrounding the movie that nobody would bother watching, but the film did quite well and has a relatively large number of views on Disney Plus. Disney’s iron grasp on the entertainment industry means that they don’t need to be making quality content to be successful. Slap the Disney name on basically anything and people will watch it. This proves to be a big problem in the film industry, especially to movies like Guillermo Del Toro’s Pinocchio.

Del Toro’s Pinocchio (2022) is destined to be a great movie. It’s also a movie that is predestined to have much less viewers than Disney’s latest version. Esteemed Mexican director Guillermo Del Toro has been working on this passion project, a stop-motion version of Pinocchio, since 2008. Lack of funding delayed the movie inevitably until Netflix decided to acquire the project. This movie, releasing December 9th on Netflix, recently had its world premiere at the BFI London Film Festival and first reactions have been incredible, with the movie currently holding a 100% on Rotten Tomatoes. The trailer oozes magic. The stop-motion animation and the character and set design looks very charming. The movie also boasts an all-star voice cast including Ewan McGregor, Finn Wolfhard, Ron Perlman, Tilda Swinton, and Cate Blanchett. So yes, the movie looks great, has an amazing cast, and has great reviews. Comparing it to Disney’s Pinocchio, Del Toro’s version looks to best it in almost every way, but with less advertising and no notable brand name attached, the movie is doomed to have much lower viewership numbers.

Basically, the point of all this is to say that we should be supporting and championing movies like Del Toro’s Pinocchio, not another Disney remake. Disney could make quality content, they have the money and talent, but what incentive do they have to work harder when the low-quality content is already so successful? Time and time again people complain about these remakes that Disney keeps feeding to us on Disney Plus’s conveyer belt, but we watch them anyway. What does that say about us and the media we consume? Are we watching the type of media we want to support? Please, go watch the trailer for this new Pinocchio. Get excited. Get your friends and family excited. Most importantly, watch the movie when it releases. Maybe I hope for too much. Maybe this article is nothing but a Jiminy Cricket acting as a conscience to anyone who reads it. After all, Collodi wrote in his book, Pinocchio, that “a conscience is that still small voice that people won’t listen to.”

Andor: Returning to the Heart of Star Wars

(Guest post by Ben)

The following article contains spoilers for Andor.

What makes Star Wars…Star Wars? Is it the Force? Laser swords? Or perhaps it’s huge space battles with galaxy-wide stakes? Since Star Wars first came to us in 1977, we’ve been enamored with the Darth Vader, awed by the flashing of lightsabers in the heat of battle. We’ve also made the subconscious connection that these things are Star Wars. But it’s more than that. Star Wars is about high-stakes and triple salchows over molten lava, true, but it’s also about individuals. And in the Andor series on Disney+, we get to see just how important individuals are to the saga. It shows us that we don’t need mystics and space-magic to have a good time. It shows us that lightsabers don’t need to be brandished to stimulate awe and wonderment in the viewer. And, perhaps most importantly, it shows us that the Star Wars universe does some of its best storytelling when focused on the little guy(s). 

Smoke and Mirrors

The first season of Andor was a whopping 12 episodes which, by today’s standards, is nothing to balk at. Throughout those 12 episodes, we were able to see the inner-workings of the Empire and how it became necessary for ordinary people to push back and to join a cause many didn’t know they were joining. Part of the magic of Andor was seeing the day-to-day, routine lives of both Imperial supporters and those who wished they had not lived to see such times. What makes that important? We see the struggle, and it connects us to the characters.

With Jedi and Sith doing quadruple salchows and performing incredible feats, it’s easy to separate ourselves from those characters. After all, quadruple salchows are basically impossible for someone like me (so is just a single, but that’s beside the point). However, when it comes to the routine, to the heavy burdens and difficulties of life…we feel that. We live that. And so it becomes more real—and more important—for us.

Showcasing the Grandiose

And, yet, despite the day-to-day antics keeping things interesting, there is awe and there is wonderment in this show. The celestial event during the payroll heist. Cassian Andor’s backstory of how he left his home planet. The massive anvil that acted as a bell for the people of Ferrix. The worldbuilding in Andor was wonderful, and it helped pull the viewer in to the main events of the show as well. 

For the People

What made Andor so engaging, I think, is because it focused so much on the little guy. Cassian himself started out as not much more than a budding tribal warrior. But then there was Syril Karn, the former deputy inspector who fell from grace due to his over-zealous approach to apprehending Andor. Syril’s life went from something he believed in—the pursuit of order and justice—to a space-office worker. In a cubicle. Isolated. But his struggles are compelling. I mean, I’ve been there! Okay, maybe not been fired for trying to apprehend a known killer in his jurisdiction, but I’ve felt the monotony of work, the desire to be more, and the crushing weight of defeat when my professional plans didn’t work out. (But don’t worry, all is well now.) He is the Everyman, in a sense, of the Star Wars universe.

But let’s not forget Kino Loy, the vocal taskmaster of unit Five-Two-D on the impregnable prison-factory on Narkina 5. All he wanted was to work his days off until he would be released. No antics, no talk of revolt, just work and be released once his time was up. As we got to know him, though, we recognize that he’s torn. He knows he should do more, but his time is almost up, so what’s the point? Best not try and rig the system, right? But when everything falls apart, he’s the one that leads the inmates to overthrow their Imperial overlords. He fights tooth and nail to get his comrades out—as many alive as possible. However, once the mass of escapees reach the edge of the installation, it’s jump into the churning water and swim to shore—or remain on the floating fortress and be tortured before being killed. We recognize Kino’s deep sacrifice when we learn he can’t swim. From his all-in performance in this role, Kino pulled at our heartstrings time and again, then ripped them right out when the truth dawned on us, the viewers. Kino knew—all while leading the charge and getting everyone out—that he would not make it out. He knew this fight was 100% for others, and that he had to sacrifice himself in order to free the (likely) innocent inmates.

Kino’s final episode, “One Way Out,” is, perhaps one of the best Star Wars moments we’ve seen yet. Heart, grit, and emotions through the roof. There were no mystical powers doing the rescuing, no laser swords for show, and not even a mention of higher stakes. It was an individual level, with characters using their own instincts and knowledge to escape. The stakes were high, yes, but we didn’t need to know they were helping build the Death Star to give us a reason to cheer for them as they escaped. The truth is, it was the individuals we were cheering for, with or without any knowledge of a planet destroyer in the works.

There are countless others I could mention that played a huge role in my love for Andor: Cassian’s mother, Bix, Lonni Jung (the Rebel spy in the ISB), and Karis Nemik (the rebel idealist part of the payroll heist). Even the higher-ups in the organizations Each one of these individuals sheds additional light to the inner workings of not just the Star Wars universe as a whole, but to the deeper reasons why people fight, why they live, and why they die. 

In Review

Gosh, I love Andor. The episodes are engaging, even when it’s mostly just different parties talking with each other. Everything feels so tense, like every word matters. Come to think of it, I find the dialogue so tightly written that every word likely does matter. The dissonant music adds to that tension, and the action is everything I love in a Star War. From beginning to end, Andor is a storytelling masterpiece. Sure, it might veer from the traditional Star Wars as we have come to know it, but everything combines to create a five-star visual meal that demands coming back for seconds. 

Tales of the Jedi

Disney Plus recently released a series of shorts chronicling the stories of two fan-favorite Star Wars characters and they grow into their character. Episodes 1 and 5-6 center around Ahsoka Tano. Episodes 2-4 are about Count Dooku. None of them are stories that I would have felt I was missing as part of the Star Wars narrative, but they add depth and insight into Ahsoka and Dooku in a way that won’t be too soon forgotten.

Episode 1 - Life and Death

First off, oh my gosh, baby Ahsoka is better than Baby Yoda or Baby Groot. This story takes place only a couple years before The Phantom Menace. While Ahsoka is featured prominently, the episode is more about Ahsoka’s mother and her love for her daughter. Maybe we’ll get to see her mother again in the Ahsoka series? Who knows? One thing I’d change about this episode is maybe including a scene where Master Plo found her and seeing how hard it was for Ahsoka’s mother to let her go.

Episode 2 - Justice

So I don’t know what I expect from the origin story of Count Dooku, but dang it got dark. I think Dooku was like any devoted person, whether to religion or politics or whatever, and when the thing he worshiped proved imperfect, he lost his faith. He must have thought very highly of the Republic to slip so far and so hard into his darkness. But that’s just the beginning…

Episode 3 - Choices

Deeper into Dooku’s downfall. It’s so intriguing to see him become disenchanted with the Senate and the Jedi Council. It kind of reminded me of Ahsoka’s story (maybe that’s why hers are the other half of the shorts) as she was betrayed by the Council. While she was on her own, she became even more disenchanted with the Jedi. But instead of turning to darkness, Ahsoka turned to something good. Too bad that’s not what Dooku did…

Episode 4 - The Sith Lord

My first thought: “Ohhhh so this is why Obi-Wan couldn’t find Kamino’s information.” This short brings up to the time of The Phantom Menace, with the initial action happening during the movie and the rest after Qui Gonn’s death. I don’t know much about Master Yaddle, but even without that knowledge… yikes. Her death hit hard. And I suppose this is when Dooku fully stepped over to the Dark Side.

Episode 5 - Practice Makes Perfect

I will always love getting more depth to Ahsoka’s relationship with Anakin. And as many have pointed out, it adds an extra layer to Ahsoka’s escape during the Clone Wars finale. It makes me wonder if Vader would be proud of his old padawan for learning his lesson or would he be upset that she survived Order 66 because of him? Also, I can’t neglect mentioning the Caleb Dume cameo; it makes me want to start my rewatch of Rebels.

Episode 6 - Resolve

It’s heartbreaking to see Ahsoka at her low point. It’s the classic reluctant hero story. Her wake-up call here basically leads straight into her role in Rebels. Only thing missing was maybe a cameo of Hera (I wondered if we’d see her when I saw the Twi'leks in this episode). Now I’m guessing that’ll be the last we see of Ahsoka before her series airs sometime next year.

Overall I enjoyed Tales of the Jedi. And if they want to give us more tales of more Jedis, I’d be very okay with that. In the meantime, may the force be with you.